Monday, July 19, 2004


We are so lucky that this man will never be in control of America's nuclear weapon codes!! Imagine if he left them in a French cafe or German beer garden?!

He doesn't have cable and now we know he doesn't own a cell phone...

From the New York Daily News...
Howard Dean was robbed!

If Howard Dean ever had any reason to scream his head off, this was it.

The former Vermont governor - whose once-frontrunning presidential campaign ended with a shriek, not a whimper - was on his way last week from a Canadian vacation to a Washington, D.C., fund-raiser.

But on his layover in the American Airlines terminal at JFK, he was told that bad weather would keep him from arriving on time at the Women's National Democratic Club.

There, on Wednesday night, some 350 Dean fans - who gave thousands of dollars to Dean's Democracy for America organization - were waiting eagerly to hear his remarks.

But thunderheads had gathered along the route to D.C. and Dean's flight couldn't take off. So a speaker-phone was set up at the fund-raiser, and Dean went to a pay phone, retrieved a calling card from his wallet, and dialed into the event while resting his wallet on top of the phone.

As he was delivering an impassioned pep talk about impending Democratic victory, Dean saw some disembodied fingers suddenly slip around his wallet - containing all his credit cards and an undetermined amount of cash - and just as suddenly disappear with them.

"I gotta go. Somebody just stole my wallet," Dean abruptly ended his speech.

But instead of saying "YEEEEAAAARRRRGH!" Dean calmly filed a police report and - using his passport in his briefcase as identification - eventually made his way back to Burlington.

Where everybody knows his name.

The NYPD has identified a number of suspects in the pilfering of Dean's wallet..

Hillary Clinton: She recently announced she would take people's hard-earned money "for the common good." Her Robin Hood thievery might have started at JFK airport.

John Kerry: Just to rub salt in Dean's wounds.

Any Deaniac: Several good reasons 1)It's been tough living out of a car since The Scream ruined any chances of electoral glory. 2)No more campaign freebies like Starbucks coffee 3)Need money to donate to Nader.

Bill Clinton: Payback for all that "I'm Howard Dean, and I represent the Democratic wing of the Democratic Party!"

John Edwards: Because he's been ripping off people for years.

Al Gore: Too many reasons to list here.

WHO DO YOU THINK STOLE HOWARD DEAN'S WALLET? Vote for one of the usual suspects or you can finger another potential criminal...


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