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Tuesday, August 03, 2004


AN ADVOCACY LESSON FOR REPUBLICANS: BE "COULTERIAN!" -- ALBERT GREENLAND'S ANN COULTER RANT 


By Albert Greenland, guest blogger for The Galvin Opinion

Ann Coulter is the only Republican who acts like a Democrat

Today via The Galvin Opinion I coin the term “Coulterian.” It is an adjective calling to mind Ann Coulter’s witty, pugnacious, caustic, brilliant style of attacking liberals and the liberal agenda. I hope the term catches on and that other Republicans learn from that icon instead of criticizing her. Ann Coulter is, in my opinion, one of the best “spin doctors” alive. Here is my Ann Coulter rant, referencing the queen bee herself:

I had the pleasure of finally meeting Ann Coulter in person (and taking a picture with her!) during her May debate with Al Franken in Hartford, Connecticut. Coulter is the only Republican that truly understands advocacy; in fact, she is the only Republican who acts like a Democrat. Inside the theatre, the raucous crowd of crusty, smug, overfed, upper class Connecticut liberals taunted Coulter. At times during the debate, she could not get a word in edgewise over the rants and jeers, but she fought back hard. At one point she urged the crowd, and I may be paraphrasing just a tad, “Wow. Keep up the behavior. This is just like the Paul Wellstone memorial service.” The most Franken could do was ask Coulter, on the record, how old she was and accuse her of lying about her age on a driver’s license. Coulter retorted, “I’ll tell you how old I am if you tell me how tall you are.” Why can’t the Republicans take a hint? Coulter is the only one who gets it. The best the average Republican pundit can do is to make an attempt at an apology or an excuse, but that is not the answer. We have to circle the wagons around our guys, and gals.

Except for Zel Miller, no Democrat is wishy-washy about supporting “The Party.” Democrats are soldiers, advocates, fierce defenders of “their guys.” To hell with the nation and the security of its citizens, average rank and file partisans will circle the wagons around their own. Just look at how various corrupt Democrats like Bill Clinton have benefited from the phalanx that swings into effect the moment a Democrat’s scurrilous and illegal behavior is exposed. Ed Gillespie, and every Republican politician or pundit should proudly and vociferously advocate for fellow Republicans and conservatism in general. Is Ann Coulter the only one who understands this? Where Democrats come at us like snakes, we must be mongooses. Wake up Republicans, and have some courage for a change! You won’t melt. Cheney had it right when he finally told that flimflam artist Patrick Leahy, “Go f--- yourself.”

Everything is at stake here. The Democrats, like all other rank and file socialists and communists, will do anything to promote their agenda (remember how millions were killed by Lenin’s Red Army during the Communist uprising that began in 1917 Russia). It is time to pull off the gloves and fight back. We will not sell out America to save ourselves, but we will act more like Democrats. It is time to circle the wagons. Republicans must tell the truth, and it is that simple. Let’s tell the truth about how Clinton failed to protect American interests when terrorists struck over and over again. Where the Democrats lie and blame 9/11 on Bush we must not quiver silent in the dark and rely on posterity to redeem us. Most forget that the Twin Towers were bombed during the Clinton administration—and he did nothing about it. The Sudan offered us Bin Laden on a plate, but Clinton and Janet Reno did not wish to wrongfully detain him. No, the only terrorists Reno labeled and jailed were nonviolent abortion protesters. Yes, we have to act like Ann Coulter and publicly admit and proclaim that the Democrats/liberals are behind every problem in America today. Let’s protect our own and not cannibalize ourselves (i.e., prospective Illinois senatorial candidate Jack Ryan). Please, for the sake of our team, take a lesson from Ann Coulter, and scorch the Earth with blinding partisanship.

Remember, in the end, the public respects strength. Democrats spin themselves as “strong” by boldly vilifying Republicans, and Republicans just sit back like fat-cats assuming they will win by less than a percentage point because that is the difference between the sane and the insane. All Bush has to do is to get up at a press conference and say, “Okay I am finally taking my gloves off because the Democrats have insulted me, this nation and our troops one too many times,” and the public will love what he does. High ranking and low ranking Republican politicians, and pundits must get out there and steadily place the blame where it belongs—on the shoulders of the Democratic Party. If anyone is not sure what I mean and needs a primer course, just watch Ann Coulter. Emulate her. That woman has moxie. Be Coulterian!

Update: Curtis of a_sdf, disagrees with the thrust of this argument. James Joyner has interesting info from the Beltway traffic jam.


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