<$BlogRSDUrl$>

Tuesday, November 09, 2004


I WONDER: HOW'S IT GONNA BE? 

Things that make you go hmmm... 21 Questions for the upcoming year(s) in politics



1) How many times are the networks going to show Senator Kerry's face for a reaction shot when President Bush gives his State of the Union address?

2) How many times have you seen Kerry shown at a State of the Union before?

3) I'm guessing, zero?

4) When does a losing presidential candidate lose Secret Service protection?

5) Is it weird when the Secret Service just drive away from your house for the last time? Is it weirder that you now have to be responsible for finding your hairbrush?

6) Does Edwards have to train for chasing ambulances like the way a runner trains for a marathon?

7) Did Bill and Hillary give each other a high-five on election night, or what?

8) I wonder if Bill had to stifle his laughter when he called John Kerry to give him campaign advice?

9) "I don't want to get Daschled." How many times have Sens. Max Baucus (Montana) and Kent Conrad (North Dakota) told that to their staffs in the last week?

10) Mondale, Dukakis, and Gore invited Kerry into their exclusive club. Is it true that all 4 of them ran for club president and lost?

11) How come Kerry never mentioned Israel in his convention speech? Why did he call Arafat a statesman? Where did he think he was, France?

12) The Democrats think the White House stole the election. Is it true that they are going to serve Barney with a subpoena?


Part of the vast right-paw conspiracy?


13) Howard Dean wants to be the DNC chair. How great is that?

14) Have you adjusted your tv's volume now that Terry "I Shout When I'm Lying" McAuliffe has been laughed out of D.C.?

15) How much tapping and dancing is Hillary going to do when she runs for re-election to the Senate in 2006?

16) Did you hear that Dick Cheney's cute, boyish charm helped President Bush get the womens vote?

17) Does the New York Times know that the Red States actually have running water, indoor plumbing and electricity?

18) Are the Democrats going to learn their lesson from nominating a liberal senator from the Northeast in 2004 by nominating a liberal senator from the Northeast in 2008?

19) Why did I see Dan Rather buying a beat-up old typewriter at a Manhattan flea market?

20) Is Kerry going to get fat and grow a gross-out beard?

21) Has CNN called Ohio for Bush yet?


|




This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?